Rain

The snow has turned to rain now.  The whole valley is foggy.  What a dreary day!

More Snow

It's been snowing the past two days. It's hard to believe it's almost May.

Snow

Remember when I was complaining about the dreariness?  Well, over the weekend we got a bunch of snow.  Everything was white again, but then the wind blew the snow out of the trees.  There's still plenty left on the ground, though.

I've managed to unpack the suitcases and put most of the stuff away. Why is it that I get home with more stuff than I went with, and the new stuff doesn't have anywhere to go?

I wish I had a big knickknack cabinet that had glass doors to keep the dust out. I'd put the new cups Debbie got me and the water fountain that Aunt Charlene got me. I also have a lot of other really pretty things that I've received as gifts. Then I wouldn't mind putting one or two of my collector's dolls in the cabinet, too.

But until I have a dust free place to display my pretties, then I will keep them either in the box or in a cabinet.

Grief

Brad's wife, Kathryn, was killed in an automobile accident.  Their daughter was injured, but as far as I know, she will live....can I say "be okay"? or "survive"? I don't know that. I've never met Brad or his family, but I've met with grief, and he's a cruel companion.

Last year when Josiah died, I thought I would go crazy with grief.  The unexpected death of a child felt like the worst tragedy in the world.  Losing one's mate, though, is something that you will never get over.  I cannot even imagine the enormity of the loss or the crushing pain one feels even as your eyes open in the morning, before you realize it's not a dream, that it's true... she's gone.

As the feelings of grief swell up into my nose, and pour from my eyes, I sense the deep pain you are going through.  I don't think I could survive if I were to lose my mate.  How will you?  You will, though, you will keep going and the days will pass, one after the other, in a numb state, your body going through the motions of living, one step in front of the other.

So many deaths, too much pain.  The loss of one human life is too much. 

Dreary

Alaska is really ugly, imo, this time of year.  I can see the half-melted ice sculptures around town.  The trees are bare, and there's no new snow to make everything look beautiful.  The temperature is still too cold to do anything summery, but it's too warm to do anything wintery either.

Checking the Mail

You wouldn't believe the problems I've had trying to put this cute little graphic on this page! In fact this whole day has not been going my way.  I woke up to a couple of situations that had me in tears.  Then I tried to focus on something else, making a webpage for my sister.  That should have been simple, but my computer crashed three times while I was trying to make a simple bar to separate the adoptions. I needed to quit fiddling around with the computer and go pick up my mail.  I've been gone for two months, and it's all stacked at the post office.  Before I left on my trip, I notified the post office I'd be gone so they would hold my mail. By the time I got to the post office, it was 4:30 p.m.  First I couldn't remember exactly which box was mine. I've been gone for two months, afterall, and every box looks the same except the number. What is my box number anyway? I can't even look on my driver's license because I have the other PO box number on that. I try the other PO key and it doesn't work either. Then I remember! It's after March 31. That's the day my rent expires. I can't get the bill because it's in the box. I didn't bring any money or a checkbook. I was just going to pick up the mail, remember? You don't need any money for that.  Well, not unless you don't pay your box rent three months before it's due because you don't know you are going to be out of town that long.. My only recourse was to go to the bank. I drive down to the bank, wait in the drive-thru line, and withdraw some money from my savings account.  While I was waiting in line, I checked my dayplanner for the date to write on the withdrawal slip.  Oh, no!  My doctor's appointment that I rescheduled from last Wednesday is today at 10:30 a.m.  I've missed it! By now it's 5 o'clock traffic as well as the school buses that take the middle school kids home, and the city buses are running everywhere. I have to wait for an oncoming bus to make a left turn so I could make one, too. Why didn't I do it at the same time?  Sure, if I trusted him to turn.  You don't know my record with automobiles if you think I'm going to stand down a city bus. Finally I get back to the post office just in time to get in line behind two people who are shipping their summer food stores via parcel post.  One has about 23 boxes going to Rampart and the other person has an equal number of banana and orange boxes going to Fort Yukon. So since I have a lot of time now, I look through the whole collection of post cards on the display table. Ooops, I dropped them, and slick postcards are flinging all over the floor between stacks of boxes. When I finally get my turn at the window, I asked to pay my box rent. By now I've had plenty of time to remember the number, and just in case I got it wrong, I remember I have pre-printed labels in my purse with my address on them.  The clerk disappears for a minute, and comes back to take my money. I also buy some stamps and end up spending the $100 and then some that I'd withdrawn from the bank. Box rent is now $80 per year. I asked the clerk if she would unlock the box, and she said, "I already did." "I don't know," she said, "but if there is you don't have to stand in line again, just come around here and I'll get it for you." Right!  I'm going to cut in line in front of those twenty people behind me that have been waiting half an hour while all the banana boxes in Fairbanks get shipped outa town.  No way. I go open the post office box, and sure enough, there's the yellow card along with some mail that accumulated after I was suppose to have come home last month.  I sorted out the junk and outdated flyers, all the while keeping my eye on the line to the windows.  When there were two people left, I headed for the door. Oh, no, I see out the window that a man is coming in carrying two boxes. I hurry from the box side to the window side of the PO just in time to be fourth in line. No, I didn't take cuts, and I ended up getting a different clerk this time. I picked up the rest of my mail, and left. I'd had enough for one day. Altogether, it only took me two hours to pick up my mail.  Not a bad day's work. ;)

	My sister and I had two months to spend together.  For a couple of weeks, we were in each other's presence almost 24 hours per day.  Someone asked me, "How do you and your sister get along?"   I answered, "We never speak a cross word to each other."